In this extract from ‘You! In A Nutshell’ we start to address the troubleshooting! Readers of the previous 5 months will be immediately able to put this piece into context; for those other who may be looking at our variation to ‘life skills’ training, self esteem and responsibility may need to quickly review the previous editions of the 3rdi magazine or, alternatively, take a quick trip to the website for access to the best £10 you may ever invest in yourself.
In either case, I hope that you will see the approach, eminently practical, and the ethos, YOU are in control. You really are; of your emotions, reactions, responses and behaviour.
Anyway, enough preaching. Enjoy.
And please leave any comments you feel are appropriate.
Still not working for you?
In this chapter you can expand and develop The 5 Steps. If you still think that it is not working yet, you will find suggestions and techniques that could resolve why not.
Also, for those of you who would want to create a more detailed and precise method for your transformation, the process explained in Question 4 will allow you to do so.
Before that, however, try these suggestions.
A brief test
It may be as simple as asking yourself:-
Who or what am I blaming outside of myself?
How am I framing my experiences?
Am I applying my convenient beliefs?
How am I communicating to myself?
What or who am I allowing to effect me?
Have I got the keys to the vehicle? and has it got plenty of juice.
Am I taking 100% responsibility?
With this in mind, get the key and check the vehicle again (re-apply The 5 Steps) paying particular attention to building and developing your anchors.
Remember though that a different result is exactly that, different! There is no failure, only feedback.
It IS a change. You have broken the old pattern in some way by changing a part of the program or recipe. The result may not be exactly what you expected, but it WILL be different from the old outcomes. Not failure, simply feedback.
Are you repeating a similar behaviour?
Don’t worry. It may be a well trodden path for you but you, will be able to revisit this issue from a different perspective. A perspective of new thinking and you have already done something different because you are reading this book. You have taken action. This is a different action so the results must be different. So, pat yourself heartily on the back for that!
Next, if you ARE taking full responsibility for the emotions that you are feeling, ask yourself:-
Has this happened before?
Has this affected you in the past? (Maybe most your life?)
Are you dropping other previous unresolved events onto current situations?
If so then remember that it is only when you stop blaming and take responsibility for your emotional responses and behaviour and for your communication, will you find yourself experiencing patterns being broken.
Then and only then will the lessons appear. Until you take responsibility the lessons are outside of your awareness. Be aware that you and only you are responsible or in charge of your emotions and no one else. This you have learned (Thinking) and are now becoming increasingly aware of ‘Doing’ and simply by becoming aware of the issue is a massive forward step. Well done.
Take the time to ask yourself the right questions such as:-
What HAVE I learned from this?
What can I do differently?
How can I make even small improvements?
How long did it take me to ‘get it’ this time?
Now pat yourself again on the back for being aware of this. You have put yourself back in the driving seat of your own vehicle and have a choice of where to go.
There will be progress and it does not matter how big a step this is at any one time. Any and all progress is good. You have layers and levels and by continuing to be aware that when you strip off these layers and of changing behaviours, of getting closure and of being at cause, your feelings will reward you. In fact, you are on the way to a peaceful mind and a more peaceful life.
By applying The 5 Steps and by moving from Thinking to Being you will be living a responsible life and will be living at cause with an ever opening mind. And all because YOU have decided to act.
How good do you feel now?
You! In A Nutshell by Philip A Birch and Warren Adams
We all have a unique way of processing and experiencing our world
We do this in ways that we as individuals have been conditioned and programmed to process and experience it. How this information is processed and how then we project this into our view of the world directly influences how we experience it.
By understanding how the body/mind works and by developing more flexibility, balance and inner strength you can develop the ability to stay in a good state of mind for the majority of the time.Look at it like yoga for the brain. It should be your choice to have the life you would like to experience not the one you have been conditioned to experience.
In A Nutshell we provide you with the simplest, quickest and most practical solutions that you can apply in your own way, in your own time, in your own world. Our aim is simply to be as simple as we can possibly be, to allow you to choose whether to change or not and, if you do, how to do it if you wish.
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