We learn so much from our parents and families. I was fortunate to have good parents, but they were tough. Mostly tough on themselves. I was born and raised in Brooklyn, NY. So were my parents. New Yorkers have a reputation for being tough. And we are: tough and resilient. My parents had a double dose of toughness. One from being hard on themselves, the other from being born in Brooklyn. I inherited both layers of toughness. I can be self-critical: really hard on myself. I’m happy to report that I am light-years better than I used to be.
Does your ego beat the pants off of you? Mine certainly has. It appears for me as that inner voice that says, “You’re too fat, too dumb, too ugly, blah, blah, blah.” This inner demon used to drag me through the dirt. Many years ago, I was hired to speak at a conference. While the folks seemed to be genuinely happy with the talk, I was not. You could not convince me otherwise. On the drive home, my ego did not let up. “You have no business doing this. You were terrible.” For the first time in my life, I began to listen to what I was saying to myself. I was horrified. At all times, I go out of my way to treat people with honesty, kindness and respect. I was being anything but to myself.
I asked myself, “How can you treat people with such kindness and yet speak to yourself in such a dreadful way? You wouldn’t let anyone speak to you like this, yet you’re beating up on yourself right now? Do you see what you’re doing?” This inner voice that sat in harsh judgment and berated me had to go. In one sense, it was like an old friend that I needed to say goodbye to: an old, horrible friend. I imagine that most of us have this voice to some degree. Mine had been flexing its critical muscles for decades. It was really, really strong. The voice did not vanish overnight. I made a decision that it was going down. There was no longer any room inside my brain for both of us. One of us had to go and it wasn’t going to be me.
I began looking for a solution. I read articles, spoke with counselors and prayed. Everything helped a little, but the inner-judger was still very much present. It was then that I recalled my good friends, the Angels. I asked myself, “How is it possible that I’ve overlooked this wonderful resource in my life?”
The name and image of Remiel, the Archangel of Mercy came into my mind immediately. At this point, I know that some of you reading this will think,
“He’s gone crackers!” Please be assured that I’ve got all my wits about me.
So many people say that Angels are just a bunch of baloney. My response is, “You’ll never find anyone on their death bed who will agree with you.” For those of you reading this who might be skeptical, just think of Angels as universal forces, like love, peace and happiness. These beings or forces are available to us at all times. In every one of my seminars I explain to students that if you ask for help from the Angels, they will never let you down. This is one thing I can promise.
I began to pray to Archangel Remiel, the Angel of Mercy. Remiel is the voice of self-love and nurturing. Remiel reminds us of our Divine nature and also points out the ways in which we act contrary to that nature. I prayed and asked for help with this so many times, I eventually wrote down the prayer in the hopes it would assist others. It is included below. For those of you for whom this practice might me totally foreign, don’t worry. It’s really easy. All you have to do is to say the following from your heart. Once you’ve said the prayer, do your best to let the entire situation go from your mind. Trust that the Angels are working on your behalf. The only other thing you need do is to pay attention for any subtle messages the Angels bring you as to the action steps you need to take to see this through. Act immediately. Don’t wait or hesitate. You will be led to the best possible solution in the shortest amount of time.
“Welcome Archangel Remiel, into my heart and life. Thank you for assisting me in ridding myself of this self-critical voice and for helping me to truly love and appreciate myself. I forgive myself for anything hurtful I may have said to myself. I vow to treat myself with love and respect from this point forward. Thank you for helping me to see this through now. I love you. And so it is.”
As I said this prayer in earnest, I found that the inner critic began to fade further and further into the background. It has become a distant memory. It can for you also.
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