Dear Daughter

Phil Birch has reviewed Roy Sheppard’s book, ‘Dear Son’ book in this month’s magazine, Roy has been overwhelmed by the response to this book and it was suggested to him that he should do a ‘Dear Daughter’ book.

He has now decided to do so and is keen to hear from as many women as possible. He has asked if we would publish the questionnaire as he keen to get as much feedback as possible.

Dear Daughter Questionnaire

Dear Daughter: what I wish I’d known at your age is a book aimed at all 15-25 year old women. It is the follow up to my book Dear Son: what I wish I’d known at your age. Dear Daughter is scheduled for publication in June 2013.

I am looking for insights and advice from women of all ages (not only mothers) on any of the topics listed below. Please share your thoughts as briefly or as fully as you wish. The style of the book is candid and frank. There’s no need to be politically correct. Confidentiality is guaranteed.

Only address the topics below that are of most interest to you. In fact, what respondents don’t comment on is also useful for me to know.

When you’ve finished, please return this document to

Feel free to forward this questionnaire to any female friends who you think would be interested in taking part. Contributors who provide insights that end up in the book will be credited where ever possible (when the same insight is shared, the first contributor will be credited in the ‘thank you’ section of the book, not next to the idea. Anonymity is therefore assured). Everyone whose name appears in the book will receive a free copy of Dear Daughter.

The deadline for submissions is 7th January 2013. Earlier is much better for me.

A 76 year old woman I don’t know heard that I was working on this book and sent me her advice list. I’ve included it at the end of this document for your interest.

Please type your responses below each heading;

what are differences between being a teenage ‘girl’ and being a woman?

what I wish I’d known about: being a woman

what I wish I’d known about: work

what I wish I’d known about: money

what I wish I’d known about: looking after myself

what I wish I’d known about: my emotions





what I wish I’d known about: relationships with others

what I wish I’d known about: men

what I wish I’d known about: dangerous men

what I wish I’d known about: marriage and divorce

what I wish I’d known about: sex

what I wish I’d known about: starting a family

what I wish I’d known about: decision-making

what I wish I’d known about: risk, responsibility and reputation

what I wish I’d known about: girl power

what I wish I’d known about: negotiating

what I wish I’d known about: random life skills

What other topics are missing?

Here’s the unsolicited list of advice from a 76 year old woman:

My own four daughters are all very different but this advice applies to all of them.

Relationships with boys, tread gently and patiently, do not rush relationships with them, it will scare boys away. Never appear to be easy pickings for predators.
Do not rush into intimate contact, try to resist experimenting with the opposite sex until the relationship is deep and long lasting. Casual sex should never become a hobby, do not give sex to obtain love. The male predator will say they love you to obtain sex.
People are often, initially, judged by outward appearances. Barriers can be created unwittingly if your appearance is outrageous.
Do not condemn when you do not condone the behaviour of others, seek the reason behind it.
Follow your dream, if you want to achieve something, go for it, do not grow old with regrets.
Beware destructive females who will try to undermine nice people especially when envious.
Material things are not important in the scheme of things. Health and happiness are more rewarding.
Never hurt another person either physically or emotionally.
Do not live to work  but work to live.
Do everything (Food, drink etc ) in moderation.
There are many different figure shapes and sizes, not one shape being the norm.
The colouring that you are born with suits your individuality, if it is skin, hair or eyes, only enhance it, do not change it.
Remember that beauty shines through from your inner self. The eyes reveal who you really are,  if the beauty is within your soul, it will be reflected in your outward appearance.
Do not grow old wishing that you had taken better care of yourself.
If you have a baby do your pelvic floor exercises following the birth. It will help the recovery of your figure and improve your sex life.
Do not over indulge children either with possessions or your time. There is a danger of their expectations becoming unrealistic, and you will  be unable to meet them.
If you have siblings do not be jealous of them, you will all be equally as precious to your parents. You are all individuals and as such are deeply loved individually.

About Roy Sheppard
A specialist conference moderator.
He is the author of the following books;
How to be The One. This book explains how to be a better girlfriend, wife, boyfriend or husband.
Dear Son is for all 15-25 year old men. It can be bought at It’s not in the shops until June 2013 to coincide with the publication of Dear Daughter.
That Bitch (with Mary T Cleary) is a forensic study of particularly dangerous and destructive female predators who target genuinely nice men and women, wreaking havoc in their lives.
Meet Greet & Prosper. A FREE eBook on how to meet new people confidently in social and professional settings. Available in all eBook formats.

1 Comment on Dear Daughter

  1. Well that certainly made me think.

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